Bhang and Renge

I see
how I must should let go
but my hands forgot the way
and my chest won’t tell them so

I see
how your silence speaks more loud
than the storms I held inside
or the words I never said out loud

I see the fall
before I fly
I feel the end
before goodbye
I see your light
but close my eyes
I see it all
and still... I try

I see
the shadow of your name
written soft on all my skin
like a flame I can’t contain

I see
how you walk away in peace
while I bargain with the past
with a love that won’t release

Every single silent night
my heart spells out your name and cry
and i blame your hips
for this madness in me

Would like get glued
Would like get hooked

You put me down, 
i drive you in

i carry hope and uncertain shame
no where to go, unless your hug
every step i take takes me round and round
with an unfair fate,
from years waiting your kiss
from years, took from granted
lost in vacum of mindless

Tell me goddess, why she lies? 
why she doesnt want to fight for my love, while im able of everything?
why i feel this concern? this dissapointed?
why the hell it just cant be??

Yes I was wrong.
Sometimes that it's hard to admit.

I was wrong when I said the word that makes me feel wrong is goodbye.
Cuz it's not.
I would like to say goodbye to many things, and few people.
Even some situations.

Word I dislike the most it's...
I'm sorry.
Cuz I always felt the worst part.
Cuz they expect the apologies, will be accepted. Or not.

Say I'm sorry it's not enough.

It was never enough.

Even with the promise I won't do again. 
I see not many have word on this world.
And they will keep making the same mistake.

So if you want to calm my sorrow 
and my pain.

Must say this.

Humm...I would like to apologize,
There's something I could do for making you feel better?

Just take care of the pain you caused.

Cuz I can easily say.

Get out from sight.
And also...
Goodbye.

That are the words people
should fear more from me.

Cuz I'll walk away
With whatever the feeling it is.
And I'll carry your sorrow.
And my wounds.

she said she was older than she was...
and it happened again....
now she says she is younger than she is..
its all a lie what i can expect

this all happens when you dont let me sleep
when your thoughts consuming me
when your action its none at all
when bury me in your soul
when you destroy myself deep in your heart
and nothing ever will remain.

is it your soul my final breath?
is it your heart where i should rest?

First thing I must say...it's
It was a pleasure had love you, even with no touch.

Even you had touched my heart every night.

With this I mean my love came from the inside. 
From the depths of my inner self.
Where i tried make space, clean and bring u in.

1st reason...
it's you had broken your promise..
Seems you have no word.
And be such a coward, for not claiming what was yours.

2nd reason
It's...that seems I'll be the one that will pay your wedding.
Tell me it's lie..that i didn't pay a dowry I should had not.
Thats also the word of your family?

I will tell them all.

3rd
I'd been waiting my whole life, and even being able send you with me,
Your family had decided punish me with more waiting.

4th
None of your action had really approached you to me.
Now a single call, it's useless, barely will serve to hurt us more.

5th
You had never cared

So now you I will bury this reasons,
And my hopes with them.
I wrote this reasons on a paper..
and i thought on write behind one motive to love you.

And I had thought it
And it was valid 
Just I didn't wrote it
It will lie on my heart.
As a tomb, 
tomb you will never visit
Cuz it's yours.

I do not write this to get u mad.
To show hate, or any means your misunderstanding of what love is.

You just must see..

I had reasons enough for it.

Today, you lose.
You lose me. You lose the hope of a joyful future.
You chain your fate to a miserable existence—
of loss, fear, and suffering.

Those you love most will leave your side.
And yet, you will always have me.
Burning in rage, crying out for vengeance.

I will take them all, like the Angel of Extermination.
For this, God brought me into the world.

They forbade me everything. They stole my time.
They punished me. They humiliated me.

Nothing shall remain but the ashes of this world,
and the eternal love God once held for us.

They kept me from joy, from giving my heart freely.
Now I am untamed, an indomitable executor,
who will strike without mercy—
in my own way, but without mercy.

Thus have you made me.

Ten thousand nights I have wept your absence,
and ten thousand more, for the wound of your love.
A thousand poems have bled from my soul
for a glimpse of heaven beside your light.

I no longer know how to let go of what I feel.
I no longer know how to cry—unless it’s for you.
I no longer know how to love—unless it’s you.
I no longer know how to write—unless your shadow
quivers at the edge of every verse.

And I no longer know what hell awaits me
for this love that won’t forget,
that won’t die,
that burns me still—
like a god without a shrine.

If you ask what do I see on you

I see beautiful woman
With such nice and big heart.
With good caring of her self and the ones you love.

You got a nice a soul,
A nice smile, nice eyes
Many things are pretty on you.

I see you got ambition. Will...
And power over me.
 I'm not afraid of it.

I dare you to chase,to follow, to lead.

I didn't dare you to love me.
But you did.

You showed it with every single thing I mentioned.

For long years.

Ever thankful
Surely we both

I love you as you are..as you came..
As you build up your self.

Will we ever regret on us?
Surely not 

Thousand times I'll commit the mistake,
On this life or others.
Of seeking for you, no matter hard it could be. No matter how far.

Cuz I know it was never a mistake
Walk my steps to you.

Would you walk with me?
When I finally can touch you.

What do you know about a man tears?
What do expect from a man?

Man that seems not to fall,
to not surrender.
That do not give up on you.

Man that could had worship and raised your values.
That is always able to show love..
even you opened a war on him.

What do you know?
About self respect he must have, 
cuz if he doesnt no one will respect him.
What do you know?
about treacheries, and wounds,
he never talk about.
and wont you let you see...

If you allow to me ask,
what do you know about me?

Would u ever care?
If I wanted build castle on sky.
Or a home made of sand?
If I wanted create the essence of the perfect parfum for your skin?
Mixed with few drops of charms,
Some tears of joy.
Some bitter citric like gintonic on saturdays night. 
We would love to share together.
And some feels of bhang smoke...
Using lotus for changing the breeze.
Had you ever cared?
Would you ever care?
If I didnt dare to tell? 
If I didn't wanted ask?
So when I do, had do I cared?
If I don't ask you now..
Would you ever care?
Do u want to build your life?
Or you wanna build together?
Do you wanna make my day?
Or will it be...just an it could had been.
Would you ever care?
If you are the other face of the coin of one soul?
If the morning ever bring sun, when you had call?
Or the night it's useless, 
and when one turns unable to sleep...
And do not do till you wake up...
for falling on your dream. Without a seen..

In the spring of my days,
I already dreamed of you.

In the summer when I saw you,
I already fell in love with you.

The autumn when you left,
returning home...was cold and intense.

And in the winter, harsh and punishing.
I long for your kisses, your warmth, your embrace...
your love.

Words solve everything,
but sometimes...they're not enough.

I don't want an armed conflict.
Just for saying I want you,
just for saying I love you.

And maybe I'll have to apologize,
with tears in my eyes.
for not knowing how to express what I feel for you,
without tears in my eyes.

I know I am a good man,
and I don’t need to beg or plead for anything.
What is given to me — it's in my hand to accept.
And what is not — it is within me not to desire it,
nor to take it by force.

If you ask yourself,
you’ll see that I was always by your side.
That for you I have killed, and for you I would die.
That if I had you in my arms, I couldn’t let you go.
And if you were to die in them,
nothing would stop me from
leaving my body behind, and following you until the end of days.

If you ask yourself...

Yes, I’ve had bad luck.
Yes, I loved you.
I cried for you, even felt betrayed.
At one point, I even wished for death —
because my life had lost all meaning.

If you ask yourself,
my life no longer holds meaning,
I swear I have no ikigai left.

But it will come to me.
Somehow.

Still... what will become of me without you?

It's true, I've lost time, loves, friends.
And none of them will ever come back.

I've missed out on the most important things in life, like:
my youth — sick, sad, alone;
I've lost opportunities, I've lost the chance to have a wife.
And even though I have many descendants,
I've never spent even 24 straight hours beside any of my children.

I'm losing the person I’ve valued most in my life.
And the chance to be happy for the rest of my days.

And you, my love?
You lost 250K for not accepting my good will...
and another 300 or 600 women with your same name
had no hesitation in accepting the money.
Yet none of them stayed by my side.

What should I do? many would ask.
Some would ask God, their parents, or family.
I’m asking you.
Because if I ask myself… neither I nor the world would find peace.

But still, I ask myself, and I say:
You have a world to conquer.
For the love of a woman will never be again.
You were the last chance,
when in truth, you were always the first.

And I, I believe I can no longer believe in love.
I don’t think it’s possible anymore.

Yes I am

Yes I am the one

The one that could make the world burn..

Just if you were just not on it

The one that
Will protect you from others
and from yourself 
Fiercely and even bloodily.

The one
Thats able to put himself
On this dangerous love
Where the wounds of distance kill
Where the silence of many year weight heavily 
Where the absent of your lips
Just made me
What I am
And what i ever was
Your dangerous lover

💕 

LOVE YOU AND EVER WILL

I hope one day..
You can say proudly
I was the first man you love.

That cover and kill for you.

That you can say proudly.
He never stopped loving me,
Nit for a second, since I came to his life.

That you can say to all.

He sweared love and respect me, 
for the rest of the life.
On the richness and on the poorness
On the health or sickness.

That you make em all see.
I'm a man of word.
And I accepted this fate

You too.

😭♥️😭

Arg!!…that lips on honey,
that chocacrisp when i see you
How can one not fall in love, with your kitty hams
your booty bumps, your feedy breast.

how not get that candy?

should i steal it…should i mate it.
should we care eachother daily?
should i start another silly conversation?

should i dream, that this tale wasnt finish..
that we fated, by ancestors and the pledges

that a star shine at the hour of our meeting

it would be nice, try and try, till one moment..
world will let us shine, ur heart full love
to enlight with tails of the will

ik kebase mer ketab?

The city is painted with lights
the moon draws your face.
And I, at so many in the morning
with my crosses and my strange moves

trapped in my body, until I dream
of traveling by your side,
we don't know what tomorrow holds
but we must be prepared

maybe God is not this one on my side
nor the angels nor the muses
obtuse lyrical ones, that vibrate in love and lust
nights of smoke, and old songs

that make the skin crawl, of the hearts
blindly I sketch out the reasons,
of so many bad tastes.
Because I long for your lips

those kisses that fill my soul
and caress me on the back
maybe your hands are just a placebo
that works as a remedy

and I can't do anything,
except give myself to it
I'm yours, and you know it
there are no egos or games

mental paradises, where I caress your breasts
after long nights of vigil
I calm the fury, and give my rage
between your hips

fire in the sheets
where there is no room for doubt
it's me and my goddess,
who free ourselves from the tortures of life

I look at the stars, I gaze at the sky,
But none of them shine the way you do, my love, my why.
The world turns, the seasons pass,
Yet it’s empty without you, none can surpass.
Nor the earth, nor the sun, nor the skies so blue,
Could ever compare to a world with you.

A word so simple, yet full of pain,
It lingers like tears in the rain.
A single utterance, and hearts will break,
It’s the one word no one can fake.
The word that will ever make cry,
Is goodbye.

A heart so deep, yet so unseen,
Hidden in shadows, lost in between.
It beats a rhythm no one knows,
A love that only quietly grows.
Invisible to the world outside,
But in its silence, there's nowhere to hide.

A cycle unbroken, forever it spins,
The story of us, where it begins.
Time may pass, the world may bend,
But this will never end.
The echoes of love, the songs we send,
Forever, it will never end.

Will you call today, or is it just a thought,
Will you call tomorrow, or will silence be sought?
Will you call me every day, or is it too much to ask,
Will you hold me close or let go of the task?
Will you, will you, or fade into the night,
Leaving me alone in the absence of light?

As salty and slippery as the water of the sea.
Lost myself in the night of your hair, to see two stars, like those that shine from the sky, observing the orb that is loved, and in a sunset of beautiful and flagrant smile that the sun of your mouth offers us.

I will sink into the darkness of your brilliant being, to remain lost in the night. my sun. see you at dawn.

You take away my fears,
You also take away my sleep,
But after your kisses,
I fall exhausted, in a clean sea of ​​heaven,
Where we shine, with love.

I have a goddess in my bed, 
who is a thousand times better than all the gods 
in your church

mere bistar mein ek devee hai, 
jo aapake charch ke sabhee devataon ke baare mein hajaaron 
vichaar detee hai

Join our hands at church

Girija mein haath aana

Always in my heart,
with a smile, 
with a beautiful look, 
with the love that I have always sought.

hamesha mere dil mein,
ek muskaan ke saath, 
ek sundar nazar ke saaath
us pyaar ke saath jisake mainne hamesha talaash kee hai

I have spent years devoting my insomnia to you,
and this week my dreams too,
I have kissed you, hugged you, licked you
and I have slept happily, for the first time in a long time

This is how I spend my nights alone
dreaming of you, watching you cry in silence
but I'm there by your side,
and you don't feel my presence. 
It hurts me, not being able to console your sorrows…
not being able to solve your insomnia with kisses. 
not being able to share my dreams with you, 
not being able to give you the hug that makes you feel how much I love you.

In the dichotomy of life,
we must observe how subtlety
is more powerful than brute force.

As the delicate, it does not have to be fragile.

And here this humble poet,
with the subtlety of a life worked for, yearns for the delicateness of your love

I would die for you
but I prefer to love you until I die,
to be reborn, to embrace you again.

It doesn't matter how many lives pass, 
you are still just as beautiful in my eyes.
Just as special in my heart

i love you
i would like to say now i live you
and be sure i will never leave you

what a trick eh?

I've hit rock bottom, it's true.
But I still have my goals.
I've done things I'm not proud of.
I have lost people who valued me.
And here I am, talking to you, 
without seeing you, without feeling you, because I have no one and nothing.

I'm lone poor and sad
But I won't look back
I had born to succeed 
And make this world mine
I ain't make wrong taking what's mine
And you got the choice
To stay on my side
...
And this will keep on...like who knew
How can one? Be so stupid, to rule over 

this world.

Must be mad...
must be genius...
must be poor...

And I have a lump in my throat... that won't go away...

a sorrow that torments me... and does not fade...

I don't see light, I don't feel darkness

just remains of a fleeting love

that comes and goes...and never stops.

That clings to me in the pain of the soul..

in the feeling that everything is lost..

I just have to take one last breath

and remember that I loved you

Let me be with myself.

Let me with my solitude.

Let me express my feel.



Because i always shy up.

when on your eyes, 

i read "My love"

I wont be able,

to love you once again.

because when that love started,

it got to infinity on couple seconds.

And god knows, i dont regret.

I cant regret.
Not 'cause selfish feelings.

Not 'cause i expected you, since i was child.

Not 'cause my love died.
		

I want to die by your side

because for you I die of love

I want to fall asleep in an eternal sleep

where we both live

and when i come back to life

I will follow the footprints of that goodbye

I would like to love you,

without offending. 

Because... 

I would like to love your caresses

so full of blushes. 

So innocently expert, so full of affection and real as the mattress

where we sleep. 

I would like to love you,

still broken and pieces... 

well I keep a mold of you,

the one that opens in my nights... 

for the smile of dawn. 

The unknown of the walls... 

that I would like to love

For appearing again

for illuminating your face with beautiful smiles,

for dancing in heavenly space,

for covering your face with those black hair,

every time you fall in love with something.



For that things: I love you 

Lend me your love, I swear I won't sell it.

I will treasure it as from my childhood my dolls

and when you see that you need self love

I return it to you without problems, and I give you a little of mine too

Blessings for you and yours

Never give up

Love lives around the corner

These are just things someone told me.

Since the day you borned.

I carry homework.

Some verse at night,

and grate the sunrise,

with 10 sheets, full of my things.
That if i think of you.

That if i think of me.

That if we own the world.
		

If my demons talk,

i gonna take notes.

i aint gonna,

let them speak thru me
and ill be wise enough

to, see their hell from distance.
		

When im lonely, i regret.

When im lonely, i dont forget.

When im lonely, i miss you hard babe.

When im lonely, i ask to my self.
Do im dead?

Is she dead?
		

On your hands it is this present id love

On your hands there´s a chance for the future

We should work...we should 

put this hands on duty

we should siege and enjoy....we should
On your hands it´s the life to share

On your hands world seems small
		

When ever I had a wish,

It never came true. 

When ever a wish came true,

It was not asked desire.

But you are my wish, 

and my not asked desire. 

Cuz I miss your hugs,

And much more your kisses. 

So, I saw, 

a falling star this night.

And I reluctantly said:

Bring her back to me, 

or at least, 

bring her back to life. 

Because, 

im ya terrible missing, 

The best luck of my life. 

That was to meet you.

And be able to love you.

How I wish to wish you.

But I silently ask for it. 

Like one that unwittingly, 

Needs you here. 

I wonder whats your will.

If we wanted this we are living.

I wonder what keep you far from here.

If it was my bad mood,

or my wrong words.

I must say sorry. 

I'd never loved you more.
I wonder.
		

With your touch I heal my wounds.

With your touch I fill my World.



Gently movements to sky, 

of your body.

Took an instant get ready,

to prepare to love you.



With your touch I get best mood. 

With your touch I kiss the moon.

Let me look at you.

Plenty of warm joy.

Let me look at you.

One more time.
Let me look at you.

Cuz i dont want to forget,

what im fated to.
		

Someday I would like to visit your house. 

See through your window.

Converse. 

Respect your ancestors. 

Play with children.



And if id go in my life that way, 

person in person. 

What life would I have lived?

How do not eat god?

this lonely dog,

its hungry of the goddess food.

to feel no rules.



My sacred dear,

i would love you prepare some bread

My sacred dear,

i would love sit glued to your bed



How do not eat god?

this lonely dog,

its waiting to be fed, 

of charms from the sun and moon

i need your love and company

i need your kisses, and your blind faith.



like ever, i´d been feeling lonely

like ever, i rounded my mind

like ever , i´d like try to shine



i need your chance and touch,

i need your smile, while fun.

Im sorry, i failed,

but, who dont once in a life?

why i fail?

there was a sorrow,

there was a broken heart,

there is a scar,

that with your tears of Joy, 

it falls apart.



ill try to follow, everygood,

and not pain.



ill try to follow you.

There is a corner of the world,

where love can be an award,

while it waits, sufocating, shivering,

with all to gain and nothing lose,

but no chance on its gambling



There is a corner where a man prays,

where a man work hardly,

and silently sometimes he cry



yes, also on that corner...

Do you know the pain i feel?

Randomly mighty,

Such in time, last lust of the night.

Hardly, powerfull
Do you know the mist on my being?
		

Up on the stars,

i saw life.



Up on your sight,



i see the lighting of your heart.

I wish you long life,

i wish you tried ever you wanted.

I wish you dont need me as much i do,

I wish you ever find your way.
i wish you dont find me aged and ruined.

cuz i´d wish your long life make us aproach. 
		

I share your love

Laugh of joy 

Or cry unknown

Violent was a meet

Even we stayed on peace 
You my dear

Or you my fate

Unbreakable